Bittervet disease

Winning EvE

I've read somewhere that winning EvE is quitting. I haven't been around much. It all started with my trip for a party weekend to London to visit a friend of mine. It might have been alcohol poisoning, or should I say, alcohol cleansing my mind, but when I came back, I completely lost interest to log back in. 

It's not news to hear someone burning out from the game and doing a break. I had my fair share of vacations too, but always came back, sooner or later. Now it's been around 1.5 months since I did anything more than spin my ship and update queue. Even that has been a challenge lately. I have read about these bittervet diseases. In my younger days I did not know how one gets it and what are the symptoms, and how one can get it in such a brilliant* community. Well, I think I got it. If f 20 day skill queue looking too short is not a symptom then I don't know what else is.

Biggest problem

Eve is a huge time sink. I've been an active lurker of blogs and forums and I've seen people come and go. Especially people that subbed during their younger days and got more busy with their RL stuff after celebrating their N^th birthday. What's the main problem? It takes too fucking long to do anything. It's not your average insta-action game.

If you wanted something more than to blow up a shitty frigate then you are in the world of waiting pain. I think its a problem for most people, regardless what they do or where they live. Some places take more time than others. Like W-space for instance. If your goal is to find something to spew some ammo at, then you can cross out at least 2 hours right there. Scanning, waiting, hunting, scouting and more scanning. Suddenly you find some activity and spend another hour or two laying the ambush or running from one, such as outwaiting camps.

But it's everywhere like that. God forbid you lose a ship or two and a pod. If you fly something bigger than a frigate or a cruiser, good chance is you wont have a lot of spares fitted and ready to go, as also implants ready (if you live outside null). All logistics involved in market buying your shit, warping to location, fitting ship and realizing you are you are missing 2 items which are for sale... 5 jumps away.. opposite directions.. in heavy camped pipe system..

Someone who was/is living in the remote areas, with no near market and no self logistic capable pilots/alts will know what I'm talking about. Even for me, who has 7 accounts. Neutral freighter, jump freighter, basically free ISK from market with very little effort (even that's too much), was a pain to organize logistics. Good luck bringing various ships/types/doctrines and have spare ones with modules and implants. It's like a god damn full time job.

Getting the fix

Now don't get the wrong idea. I love everything about eve. The fact that it was so time consuming and "hardcore" was the style I liked/like. It's something that you could put a lot of effort and be proud of your achievements. I think this game is more suited for competitive people. These people don't get their fix from shooting bunnies on some retarded facebook game. They like to suffer, feel pain and once in a while, get that little feeling of bliss to keep them going. 

Of course there are many style of plays and to each its own. I'm sure there are a bunch of people who spend 30-1h a day and are happy with it,. Unfortunately for my style, to get my fix, I need to kill some helpless, unsuspecting victim. I need to hunt or camp or set a trap. I don't enjoy gf., but I do enjoy a good fleet fight if i get to FC. Otherwise I find no satisfaction of killing someone who is prepared to lose his ship. And to find such prey, it takes time. And time, is hard to come by.

In the end, I continue my yearly subs. I believe that one day I will find casual play and continue playing EvE.