Tuesday, February 24, 2015

COSMOS Ninja Salvaging

During my "adventures" when doing Cosmos, I saw a lot of potential. Potential as in bringing player generated content to a miserable pve that is Cosmos. There are number of thoughts I got and perhaps I will try to do some things later in the future. Let's see. Anyhow, I got quite an interesting encounter with Cosmos runner - Vlad Boreal.

Precious tractor

I was visiting one plex pocket in search for some items that I needed. If you've read my previous post on Cosmos missions, you can imagine how tedious the activity can be. Turns out, however, you CAN have some fun doing Cosmos. At other player's expense, of course. I land in the room and see a beautiful sight.

Someone has been busy. Look at all those wrecks. Look at this mtu, surrounded by all these wrecks. My fingers gets itchy and mtu is quickly converted into wreck. It's one thing to do the same in your standard mission, but to shoot it in the Cosmos plex, it's whole other story. My Ishtar with 4 drone damage amplifiers does the job rather quickly. I loot the stuff and notice Caracal yellow boxing me. I lock him back. Let's see what he does. Will he shoot me? Is he upset about all that stuff I took away? After giving carebear stares for each other, I get a convo request.

Zosius > sup
Vlad Boreal > wtf!!!!!
Zosius > ?
Zosius > so
Zosius > it is legal to kill it

Without even saying hi, Vlad was furious of me destroying his tractor.

Zosius > no you are not
Vlad Boreal > oh yeah baybe
Zosius > concord will kill you if you shoot

He then proceeds to make threats. I guess tractor held special place in his heart. I am in a tight spot. I am legal to be shot at. I try to convince Vlad, that Concord will defend me should he take a shot, but he is confident that flashy yellow skull is free to kill.

Vlad Boreal > anyone can kill you now
Vlad Boreal > noooo
Zosius > nope
Vlad Boreal > anyone can kill you
Zosius > nope
Zosius > you are wrong
Vlad Boreal > nooo i waiting my friends
Zosius > you got friends?
Vlad Boreal > yes 5 drake

Seeing as my deceitful  tactics failed I was in grave danger. I was a trigger away from being killed. To make matters worse, Vlad had 5 friends incoming in their Drakes. Outnumbered, outgunned, I feared I was running out of options. Did I make a grave mistake that finally would end up in my ship exploding? I proceed checking his corp's background.

Intel does no good. His corp obviously is very good at concealing their API information. Once Drake elite force arrives, I am toast. Perhaps I can make my way out with diplomacy?

Zosius > oh shit
Vlad Boreal > please wait
Zosius > dont kill me man
Vlad Boreal > because if think that i will atack you are wrong
Zosius > i give your stuff back
Vlad Boreal > shut up

To deescalate situation I offer to return the loot. Vlad is not interested. Only thing he wants to see is my demise.

Zosius > what are my options now
Zosius > you are full of shit
Zosius > if you attack me concord will kill you
Vlad Boreal > if you realy think thet i not undestund whots going on you are wrong
Vlad Boreal > so kiss mu metal ass
Zosius > what is going on?
Zosius > hey
Zosius > can we be friends instead
Vlad Boreal > what ?

A word - friend, is not found in Vlad's vocabulary. He is furious and doesn't understand how can someone be friends by means of explosion. Despite being confident about Concord, he will not open fire.

Zosius > if we go to station
Zosius > i give your stuff back
Zosius > no need for violance
Vlad Boreal > nope

All my diplomatic requests hit the wall. As seeing he is not interested in diplomatic solutions and neither he is willing to take action in his own hands by trying to avenge his fallen tractor, I change the strategy.

Zosius > nope what
Vlad Boreal > 1 you think thet Im noob
Vlad Boreal > 2.  i dont trust you
Zosius > are you a pro?
Zosius > 2015 player
Vlad Boreal > no
Zosius > you are just too pussy to do anything
Zosius > about your tractor
Vlad Boreal > whahahaha

If he won't do anything against helpless victim, perhaps he will take action against cheeky bastard?

Zosius > Kill: Vlad Boreal (Mobile Tractor Unit)
Zosius > all you do is tlak talk
Vlad Boreal > and sow&
Zosius > im here 10 minutes
Zosius > and you dont do shit
Zosius > such a noob
Zosius > because you know if you shot me
Zosius > concord will get you
Vlad Boreal > hahahahahahahahah
Vlad Boreal > you will kill me
Zosius > of course
Vlad Boreal > not concord
 Zosius > you are a noob
Vlad Boreal > kiss my metall ass
Vlad Boreal > Победа: Santo Trafficante (Maller*)

Seeing as we are getting nowhere and my 15 minute suspect timer is about to expire it's soon time to depart. For some reason he links Santo Trafficante's smartbombing Maller, perhaps to brag on how it died to concord fire with someone whoring on the killmail.

Zosius > watch futurama much?
Zosius > is that your friend
Zosius > that died?
Zosius > be sure to put new tractor unit
Zosius > i will come again to take that juicy loot
Vlad Boreal > hahahaha
Vlad Boreal > i can buy 23 tractor
Zosius > so i will kill 23 tractor
Vlad Boreal > great
Zosius > because you are too afraid to defend
Vlad Boreal > hahahahahaa
Zosius > its sad
Zosius > not funny

I have been as cocky as I could. Unfortunately suspect timer expired, we exchanged few more profanities and I went on my merry way. I have never seen 5 drakes, or any other ship for that matter, on short range scan. Perhaps some other poor bastard got in the way of my execution.

Day of salvation

The very next day, I receive an interesting convo request. It's Vlad! Is he seriously still upset about his tractor? 

Zosius > o/
Zosius > Hello Vlad
Vlad Boreal > hello! I would like to apologize
Zosius > yes?

An apology? This is the first. I couldn't believe what I saw. This must be some trick of sorts.

Vlad Boreal > I was wrong and wrong has reacted to the situation
Vlad Boreal > This game is about life and space, and you just have to enjoy
Zosius > I must say you have over reacted
Vlad Boreal > game
Zosius > for a mobile tractor unit
Zosius > but I am glad you came to your senses

Ladies and gentlemen. If you do not believe in high-sec miracles, you might want to reconsider your beliefs. There is still a light at the end of the tunnel. Carebears of high-sec can still be saved.

Vlad Boreal > just the situation in the country a bit annoying and wanted to relax a bit
Zosius > no problem Vlad
Zosius > apology accepted
Vlad Boreal > sow i hope when my pvp skill is up we will meet in low sektor )
Vlad Boreal > can you give some advice? Laser (Shansі) or guns
Zosius > advise?
Zosius > dont stay in highsec
Zosius > and find a good corp

Bygones were let to be bygones. Vlad was clearly on the right path. Perhaps this encounter will give a taste of blood in his game. He even hoped we would meet in low-sec one day. There's nothing more I could ask. A tear of happiness is shed. He asks for advice as gallant should do, to which I promptly reply that he should find another corp, preferably one where 5 drakes actually do show up.

No comments :

Post a Comment